Where do I start.... For me this journey starts in December. December 23rd to be exact. From these first lines,be advised this is a long story.
My mother was admitted to the hospital with sepsis caused by a kidney stone blocking her kidney. How, you ask, does this begin my journey? The repercussions of that illness are still being dealt with in my family. My mother, was in ICU for five days and on a ventilator for 4 1/2 of those days. It was, quite literally touch and go for the first few days. When she did get out of ICU our worries and journey were not over. She needed (and still needs) multiple procedures. The kidney that caused this issue was still in trouble because the kidney stone that started this was still there. She had lost mobility in one hand due to the medications to keep her alive. Those medications draw all the blood to a patients core to protect vital organs,this can sometimes cause the loss of limbs or digits. Luckily my mother lost none of these but her ability to use one hand was dramatically impacted. When we got home my sister took four weeks of medical leave from her job as a teacher to care for my mother. Before she returned to work we had the first procedure which was to have a stint inserted into my mother's kidney as well as lasers used to breakup kidney stones. This was a success and much easier on my mother than we anticipated. :)
We did learn however her other kidney was full of stones and a more extensive and invasive procedure would be needed to take care of this situation. We scheduled the surgery for March 16th. For the month of February, I worked part time, leaving work at 9:30 am to care for my mother when my sister returned to work. Then, beginning in March, I returned to work and took my lunch each day going to my mother's to check on her. All was well.
March 14 my mother went to urgent care with symptoms of an upper respiratory infection. We did not think it was COVID 19. However, with her surgery two days away we needed to be very careful. After testing, it was confirmed my mother had Strep and an upper respiratory infection. Surgery was cancelled at that time we were informed, March 16th was the last day for "elective" surgery. Even though my mother's life is in danger daily from another kidney blockage her surgery is considered elective.
I had planned to only miss a couple of days of work,my sister was going to stay home for a week and then with spring break the week after that, we felt we had it under control. Then came school closures. My sister, who lives with my mother, is a public school teacher. She is home. However, with my mother's condition, at any moment she could have to go in for this surgery to remove the kidney stones. I need to stay healthy to help care for her during her recovery, if all goes as planned and she is released within a few days. My job is not in a public school. I work in a Childcare (aka Daycare) facility. I have had to make the choice to stay home, without pay.
My owner, who is NEVER at our facility, and communicates only through our director has been less than understanding to staff members who have reasons they cannot work. We are not guaranteed a job when this is over. For me, this is not the end of the world. We can survive without my paycheck. However for my co workers and people I care about, it is not the same. Some have opted to go back to work. Some are losing pay and worried sick. They do not qualify for unemployment because they are "opting" not to work. I say "opting" because how is it an option to endanger your daughter going through chemo (one co worker) or you child who has a heart condition (another co worker) or your child with a compromised immune system already on oxygen (another co worker).
I have been utterly depressed to be honest. I sit for hours debating do I want to return to a job that treats it's employees in such a manner? Honesty = no. However, I do adore a lot of my coworkers and to be honest, I am bored to death at home. I have not found motivation to work on my TPT products. (though I know it would be a great outlet for me) I just can't get over this hump of depression. Anyone else out there feeling depression to the point of "no motivation"?
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